10 Effed-up Thoughts I’ve had During my Group Exercise Class
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10EffedUpThoughts

As a fitness fanatic, I fully embrace the “no pain, no gain” philosophy of life. Yet pain can be humbling, unpleasant and well, painful. I’ve tried Lamaze breathing, yoga breathing, heck – even not breathing, to get myself through lung-burning sprints and core-crushing workouts. Sometimes, retreating to my “happy place” isn’t sufficient. When the going gets tough, my happy place is swallowed up by a sinkhole of self-pity and pain. While I’ve experienced some of my proudest physical feats of strength at Barry’s Bootcamp, I’ll confess that I regularly have thoughts that I’m not so proud of. I blame it on the pain. In the movie, Zero Dark Thirty, a CIA operative torturing a detainee said it best, “In the end, everybody breaks. It’s biology.”

Here are my top ten, effed-up thoughts I’ve had during Barry’s Bootcamp.

This sprint seems like the best time to stop and make sure my shoelaces are still tied.”

OMG, how many times is she going to check herself out in the mirror? Holy Sh*t, my arms are so jacked right now. Lookin’ good.”

A 30 second sprint includes the ten seconds it took to bring my speed up, right?”

That girl is totally faking that side stitch so she can take a break… B**ch stole my best move. Guess I’ll have to go for the pony-tail adjustment.”

I smoked that dude on the treadmill. Too bad he doesn’t know we’re racing.”

Wait, are my pants see-through!?”

Really dude, the red bands?”

Hmm… gay or straight?”

Oh, man, please put that shirt back on.”
Unless he’s hot, in which case it’s

Oh, man, please take that shirt off.”

Are you actually crying?! Get it together.”
30 minutes later:

I totally crushed it!”

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Minsun Park is a blogger, writer and a black belt in taekwondo who gets her ass handed to her daily by her two sons. She’s written for iVillage, SheKnows, ePregnancy and is featured in “The Hot Mom’s Handbook” by Jessica Denay. She can also be found on Facebook and Twitter: @MinsunPark

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